I’ve been saving these conversations up and need to write them down before I forget.
We are in two stages with the kiddos. Jack is starting to ask a lot of tough questions I don’t really want to answer. And Viv is starting to just say random things, but with such intensity it cracks me up.
Jack: Where does Harley pee from?
Me: His penis. He’s a boy dog.
Jack: Where do girls pee from?
Me: Um, they just pee.
Jack: Girls don’t have penises.
Me: Nope, they don’t.
Jack: So, do they only poop?
Me: Um, no, they pee.
Jack: But from WHERE?
Me: (whispering) Philip! Is it the urethra?
Jack: The WHAT??
On what she isn’t going to do:
Viv: I was calling for you!
Me: I know, that’s why I came in here.
Viv: Hold me. I need to cuddle.
Me: OK, for a minute. Then it’s night-night.
Viv: OK. I’m not going to yell for you anymore.
Viv: And I won’t cry.
Viv: And I’m not going to stick my finger in my nose.
Me: Good plan.
Jack: Mom, I need you to help me with this pirate costume.
Me: OK, but I’m getting Viv to bed. Wait a minute.
Jack: Mom, I’m going to wear this for a while.
Me: OK, but you have to put your pajamas on soon.
Jack: But mom, I’m going to be a pirate who is sleeping!
On not knowing:
Me: What do you need Viv?
Viv: I have to tell you something!
Viv: It’s a secret!
Me: OK. What is your secret?
Viv: I don’t know!
Me: Well, that’s a good secret then!